Another Year Passed by…

 

 

 

 

Oh my goodness! It just struck me.

Gone is the girl hopping in the kid’s play.

Gone is the girl in her teenage.

Gone is the girl moving from a heartbreak!

 

This year presents you a girl,

Who is transformed.

Constructing her ways,

Fighting an uphill battle,

And coping with tumultuary crowd of thoughts,

Which keep restricting her from taking steps ahead,

Wishing for the positive to cross her paths.

Learn to not be invaded by insecurities,

To have some level of faith in what she is!

 

Jumping up or falling down,

Having faith and not to frown,

Crawling up not to cripple down.

One step further, another step behind.

The girl, thus, learnt to open her mind.

Bonjour Readers

This Blog is now shifted here – http://charvikakwani.wordpress.com/

YouR LasT…

You haven’t come,

May be you would never come.

Why you have gone away?

Night is yet to be over.

Why you have gone away?

Eyes are paused,

For sleep is snatched away .

Lips are shut,

For words are suppressed by your plans.

Soul keeps waiting,

For the moment you would accept us.

A day when you would finally come,

To get what has always been yours.

But the time reversed,

And the lives were changed.

Heart stopped beating,

Waiting for you.

Wanted it only, was to be your last,

And live a relation so true.

A burden too heavy

‘Private tuitions’  are something every student must have gone through, if he or she has done his schooling in India. Nowadays, this tendency is spreading out a lot more than old times as I encounter everyday among students while working in a school. Well, it’s not like I am in denial of private tuitions  absolutely, but yes,  I have a point. I have witnessed this thing that earlier only those students who were used to be weak in any one or two subjects were sent by their parents for taking extra classes after school or the so-called ‘private tuitions’. If a class have thirty students, then the students who used to take tuitions on a regular basis were not more than fifteen or ten, which was very low compared to a time we are facing now. This private tuition stuff was only limited to classes from higher to secondary. But with the changing scenario, I am shocked to see and find it very uncomfortable to digest  but this trend has branched out all over from Kindergarten to College level. This came as a disheartening fact to me, when I saw kids who are just in kindergarten or primary classes and yet,  they are attending private tuitions and that too on a regular basis after school, which means they have no time for self-study or any other recreational activities. It’s like their little minds never take any rest or even break. They have to work hard or I can say double even at such age only because their parents do not have enough time to teach them at home and some do have a bunch of free hours in their hands but they hardly care about spending it with their kids and work hard to make them learn things at home. Parents, these days have become so much engrossed in their own lives (personal or social) that they declare a six-year-old taking the pains of private tuitions after attending six hours of school, valid and justifiable. They don’t feel that school is enough for a pupil to learn and understand. Moreover, sometimes they expect more than what should be expected from a kid at that age.  I find it very disappointing to spend the most innocent and carefree time of your life i.e the childhood in such a drastic manner. 

Even though I agree that private tuitions are helpful at some point of your schooling specially from higher school to secondary ( not for everyone), as students come across different issues every now and then in that period. In some cases, it might also prove a huge help also, since in a class of more than thirty, it becomes tough for a single teacher to take care of every student individually. You can’t held a teacher responsible for that because the teacher student ratio in a class  is what often overlooked in almost every school. But it really breaks my heart,  when I see them still making mistakes even after taking the  important private tuitions after long hours of school. The burden of bags and books on their back with the burden of six hours of school plus two hours of tuitions make them look like they are sailing in two boats at the same time. This is harmful for the natural growth of their minds and body. These days students are so much under pressure of study that they are forgetting day by day the value of leisure time or some free time to play and have little bit of fun. This is a very serious issue if we look into it.

In my class, I have twenty-five students and sad it is to say, but almost twenty among them attend a private tuition daily after school. Those innocent minds are at such tender age that they don’t even understand what they are going through, what sort of life they are living and what kind of wonderful experiences they are missing out by living such miserable lives. With that, one more thing I observe is that such students hamper the understanding of the remaining five who depend only on school and teachers for study. Though the twenty of them always remain ahead of whatever has been taught in the class but they keep shouting again and again in order to respond first whenever a teacher is teaching a topic in class and thus make it hard for those five to perceive. This particular thing annoys a teacher also and thus makes the teaching environment bitter. Sometimes, it becomes so uneasy for us to tackle them and make them understand that if they understand or know an answer, then let their mouth shut for a while until the teacher has made his point and the rest of them actually grasp that point instead of just moving their heads in a fake yes throughout a period. With these private tuitions thing going on side by side, students will never be able to understand the value of self-study, plus the parents also lose a chance to connect with their ward and experience some really beautiful moments together. I declare myself lucky that I wasn’t forced to live a life like that by my parents in my childhood and was brought up in a really free atmosphere which is essential for the natural growth of any child.

On a Rainy Night

On a rainy night,

It went something like this,

When the hearts got stick,

And the souls themselves restrict,

Propagated love.

Love that was unknown,

Touch that made them spellbound,

A kiss spontaneous,

An embrace so tenacious,

And thus the souls entwined,

On a rainy night.

Hard it was for her,

But the arms were so dense,

And the passion was strong.

Lust didn’t allow to move,

Salacity asked them to stoop.

So they kept it going,

And lost each other,

In a cuddle, so warm.

On a rainy night,

Things went above the par.

Moments were lovable,

Lock was serene.

Tongues were tied,

Due to the beauty unseen.

Eyes weren’t watching,

Ears weren’t listening

But the head could hear,

A language of Love,

A dialect of tears,

And an accent of cheer,

On a rainy night,

This is how Love appeared.

Just Yesterday

It seems just yesterday,

I finally learnt how to speak.

And yet other day,

I learnt cycling and not to freak.

It was just yesterday,

I gave my tenth birthday treat,

Noticing a slight change in my tiny physique.

 

Just another morning in school,

Still fresh an evening in the near by garden and some pool.

Playing with sand and mud,

Without caring about any thug.

Dealing with my first period and pimple,

Were the most baffling things happened to me.

The only things I used to put on,

Was a little frock or a jeans with a tee.

 

Mascara , Liner or any touch up,

I used to have nothing.

Now,  I show off like a grown up,

That’s another thing.

In those days,

There was only one hand I used to accede.

Today,

My  stupid heart longs for another one,

Whom I can call mine ,

Which is there forever to stand by me.

 

It’s totally different,

How my dreams travelled so far.

From a toy to a wedding dress.

This journey I enjoyed,

With some cheers and some scars.

Adios 2013

 

 

 

This year started with things and events I really wasn’t looking forward to. In fact I never wanted it to come, a big fool I was! But as they say it really isn’t under anyone’s control, you  have got to keep going. Anyway, I forged ahead and found things worth fighting and living for one by one. The best thing I uncovered in this year is that how strong and forgiving I can be even at times when I am  absolutely wrecked.  Another thing that made this year even more wonderful for me is friendship.  I mean really people it’s not just a word, it’s a requisite.  They never give upon you even if you are least hopeful and interested. I got to travel out of my state to another one and met some really nice online friends. God! I loved it. Also with that, I enjoyed the beauty of Nature and man-made wonders ( he he my first flight). Another important thing that struck me in the middle of this year was how does it feel to live my dream. I attended teachers’ training and really each and every day in school was a day well spent. Innocent and curious kids, their queries and comments never allows you to get bored with this profession. Such an energetic and inspiring experience it was. One more important thing that took place in 2013 is my entry into the real world aka starting point of my career. I finished my studies and stuff this year and joined some school as an educator, and now everyday is a new challenge, a new something. 🙂 Each day I get compliments for my work and actions with some directions to be better. I am loving it. One thing I know  now is that, if you really are interested in your job, you never get tired, in fact you crave to explore more and more every now and then. And yes I would like to thank someone here, for that person pushed me hard enough to actually go for it. I am really grateful. 2013 was full of different new experiences that I am never gonna forget in my life.  So in the end of this year and also this post, would like to say a big Thanks to this year and people who supported me throughout. You guys mean a lot to me. Love you all! Also this reminds me of a song here. Enjoy! 😀

“Everything At Once”

As sly as a fox, as strong as an ox
As fast as a hare, as brave as a bear
As free as a bird, as neat as a word
As quiet as a mouse, as big as a houseAll I wanna be, all I wanna be, oh
All I wanna be is everythingAs mean as a wolf, as sharp as a tooth
As deep as a bite, as dark as the night
As sweet as a song, as right as a wrong
As long as a road, as ugly as a toad

As pretty as a picture hanging from a fixture
Strong like a family, strong as I wanna be
Bright as day, as light as play
As hard as nails, as grand as a whale

All I wanna be oh, all I wanna be, oh
All I wanna be is everything
Everything at once
Everything at once, oh
Everything at once

As warm as the sun, as silly as fun
As cool as a tree, as scary as the sea
As hot as fire, cold as ice
Sweet as sugar and everything nice

As old as time, as straight as a line
As royal as a queen, as buzzed as a bee
As stealth as a tiger, smooth as a glider
Pure as a melody, pure as I wanna be

All I wanna be oh, all I wanna be, oh
All I wanna be is everything
Everything at once.

Lost

Words unsaid,

Things unheard,

This silence,

Loosing mind,

Might be an invitation 

For something to happen.

 

 

 

 

Like an only lamp in the dark,

Your gestures are the only thing that spark.

A sweet poison sometimes it seems,

As if, it hauls me into a dream.

 

 

Daydreaming  I know,

Is  never good.

Overdose of love and care,

Hurts badly.

Moments want me to speak, to trust, to love and to fall again.

But courage is lost,

Lost somewhere hard to find.

 

 

May be someday,

With someone,

I might learn to love again,

I might laugh again,

I might live again.

Mountain Of Secrets

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Quite often misunderstood,

At times left into error.

Sometimes tough,

While sometimes seems easy to conquer.

It is a young woman’s heart.

 

 

Lonely in a moment,

Delighted in another one.

Delicate like a petal,

Rigid like iron.

Everyday fights a battle.

 

 

No, yes no body,

Can ever know,

What she held behind,

Is a Mountain of Secrets.

All one can ever combine,

Is a bunch of illusions.

 

 

She laughs,

She cries,

She yells,

Still tries,

To bury the rage,

To carry the weight.

Yet keeps  going,

Like an unending maze.

Such is a young woman’s heart,

Hiding a mountain of secrets. 

 

 

I’m just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I don’t know where to go I can’t do it alone I’ve tried
And I don’t know why

Slow it down
Make it stop
Or else my heart is going to pop
‘Cause it’s too much
Yeah, it’s a lot
To be something I’m not

I’m a fool
Out of love
‘Cause I just can’t get enough

I’m just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I don’t know where to go I can’t do it alone I’ve tried
And I don’t know why

I’m just a little girl lost in the moment
I’m so scared but I don’t show it
I can’t figure it out
It’s bringing me down I know
I’ve got to let it go
And just enjoy the show

The sun is hot
In the sky
Just like a giant spotlight
The people follow the sign
And synchronize in time
It’s a joke
Nobody knows
They’ve got a ticket to that show
Yeah

I’m just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I dont know where to go I can’t do it alone I’ve tried
And I don’t know why

I’m just a little girl lost in the moment
I’m so scared but I don’t show it
I can’t figure it out
It’s bringing me down I know
I’ve got to let it go
And just enjoy the show

Just enjoy the show! 😉

Waiting for YoU

Mornings, days and nights,

Look for moments, yet to arrive.

A day with you,

Full of joy and love, is yet to survive.

In thy arms,

I long to die.

In thy eyes,

Tears want to dry.

In thy soul,

Thirst crave to liquefy.

A day, 

A time,

A point,

Where even death cannot scare me off from you.

A stage,

A season,

A juncture,

Where nothing else matters except love that is so true.

Have waited this long,

Can wait even more.

Will wait till you show,

And prove everything else wrong.